This support raising process has been hard. Not necessarily the trusting God with the money part. But the what do I do with my day part. I struggled for most of this year with feeling lazy, with wanting to work on support but not have enough to do to fill a day, with waking up in the morning wondering what I would do all day (not a problem most Americans tend to have). Probably sounds nice to some people, but 8 months of it is just too long. So I got a little addicted to the Today show, to Fox News, to the Amazing Race (I could go on). And going to the mailbox was the highlight of my day.
Until about a month ago. I was asking my support coach what I could do when I didn't know what to do, and he suggested taking a day with the Lord. So the next Monday I spent the whole day with the Lord- without seeing anyone else, talking to anyone else, turning on the tv, making support phone calls. And it was wonderful. Nothing about my circumstances had changed, but I had joy that I hadn't had in months. I realized that the tv was not adding anything to my life. In fact, hearing about America's terrible economy all day was causing me to struggle with trusting God to raise my support. And I realized what a blessing that I had so much free time that I could spend with the Lord. I didn't have to settle for a quick quiet time in the morning then go on with a busy day. And I realized I didn't have to feel guilty about spending those hours studying God's word just because it wasn't directly involving support raising. I may not ever have another season of life like this, where I can spend so many hours a day in God's word, so I'll take it and enjoy it while I can.
So for the past month I have enjoyed the quiet of not having the tv on and have been studying Daniel and Revelation. Daniel I'm studying on my own, but the Revelation study is with a sweet group of ladies from my church. I didn't think much at first about studying them at the same time but how incredible! They go together hand-in-hand in such a neat way. And God's writing in Daniel put the writers of LOST to shame (didn't give up that one but glad it's over!). How incredible to read prophecy and study some of it now as history and see how God keeps his promises.
And while I haven't been spending any more time on support than before, I have seen more come in over the past few weeks than the rest of this semester combined. Amazing. The Lord didn't have to do that for me; I didn't earn more support by spending more time with Him. But how great is His grace!
P.S. Maybe my lack of exciting, fun-filled days explains my lack of blog updates. Or maybe I was just never good at this to begin with :-)